Living with ADHD, Anxiety & the Shadows of the Past
Living with ADHD is like constantly being tuned into the wrong radio station. Everything’s fuzzy, distracted, loud — and no matter how hard you try, the right frequency always seems just out of reach. For me, ADHD didn’t come alone. It brought anxiety along for the ride. And with them both in the driving seat, depression wasn’t far behind.
For years, I didn’t really understand what was going on. I just knew I always felt behind, overwhelmed, and on edge. I’d put off important things until the last second — even things I wanted to do. My brain just wouldn’t cooperate. Bills piled up, not because I didn’t care, but because I couldn’t bring myself to face them. Even now, I’m terrible with coinage — I mean, if you ever need someone to lose a fiver within five minutes, I’m your guy.
Eventually, the anxiety got louder. It became physical. Panic attacks. Chest tightness. A racing heart over the smallest things. And when the anxiety drained me completely, depression crept in. I stopped seeing the point in anything. I didn’t talk about it. I didn’t want to exist. And for a while, I seriously considered not being here anymore.
But I am still here.
There’s no magical turning point in this story. It wasn’t one single moment that changed everything — it was lots of small ones. One of the biggest was walking through the doors of https://andysmanclub.co.uk. That first night, I didn’t know what to expect. I didn’t think I’d even speak. But I listened. I heard men talking about things I thought only I struggled with. And in those stories, I found a bit of myself.
Week after week, I opened up. Slowly. Quietly. And somewhere along the line, the weight I was carrying didn’t feel quite so heavy. Andy’s Man Club has become a vital part of my routine — not because it fixes everything, but because it reminds me I’m not alone. That I’m not broken. That being a man doesn’t mean being silent.
Work is still tough some days. I’ve found ways to cope — breaking tasks into smaller chunks, using alarms, whiteboards, even sticky notes everywhere. But ADHD still rules parts of my life. I procrastinate like it’s an Olympic sport. I leave things until the very last minute. I start twenty tasks, finish none, then panic and crash. It’s not laziness — it’s wiring.
And yet… I manage. I work. I show up. I live.
There are still trip-ups. Still moments when everything gets too much. But now I talk about it. I take breaks. I forgive myself more. I’ve learned that surviving isn’t just about “getting over it” — it’s about learning to carry it better.
To anyone reading this, feeling like they’re drowning under the weight of their own mind: I get it. You’re not weak. You’re not lazy. And you’re not alone.
Come talk. Come listen. There’s strength in the mess — and there’s power in just showing up.
You matter. And you’re never as alone as you think.
Need support right now?
If you’re in crisis or just need to talk:📞 Samaritans: 116 123 (Free, 24/7)
🌐 Andy’s Man Club: https://andysmanclub.co.uk
📍 Local mental health support: [Check with your GP or local services]
